Helping Your Child Through A First Crush Or Heart Break
Parents may be surprised to find out
that most child experts indicated that children have a first crush within
their first year of school, or typically between the ages of five and
seven.
However,
these crushes are not the same as the infatuation of older children or
adults, rather they are an extension of the connection and caring the child
has exhibited with members of the family. As they interact with other
children in daycare or school, they often feel very connected to another
child, and they may feel a strong connection with that other child that is
not reciprocated.
Signs
of a First Crush
The most common signs for both boys and girls of having a crush include:
• Focusing conversation on one particular child that is in their class or
around them frequently
• Asking to bring gifts, treats or special things to school to share with
the crush
• Giggling and silly around the other child or being defensive when the
subject is brought up by the family
• Increased interest in relationships, marriage and romance in the world
around them
Often kids hide the fact that they have a crush but their actions around
the romantic interest make it very clear to parents and adults.
What
to Do
It is important not to make the situation uncomfortable for the child but
to talk in simple and supportive terms. It is safe to ask the child about
his or her feelings, as well as to respect the feelings they indicate they
have for the other child.
Asking
the child if his or her "crush" seems to feel the same is
essential. This is a good time to talk about how everyone has their own
feelings, and how it is critical not to try to push someone into having
feelings or being a boyfriend or girlfriend. Talk to a child about
appropriate types of behaviors and what is acceptable and what is not
appropriate and may result in getting in trouble.
Finally,
keep in mind that kids often have infatuations that last only a short
period of time. Encourage your child to talk to you and be prepared to
listen and provide support, love and attention. Also, remember that
encouraging lots of friends is also a good way to eliminate the hurt a
child experiences if their crush isn't as interested in the friendship as
they are.
Teach Your Children To Apply Themselves
Helping young people understand that
applying themselves to tasks like schoolwork and household chores are
important to their long-term attitudes and ultimate success in life. Teach
your kids to try harder without resorting to threats or bribes with these
tips:
•
Focus on progress. Goals are important, but steady progress is the secret
of success. Instead of insisting that your child become a star quarterback
or a champion speller, emphasize improvement as he or she makes progress.
• Give children a choice. Don’t try to force your children into an
activity because you think they should do it (or because you did it
yourself as a child). If kids feel they have a choice, they’ll try harder.
Point out what talents they have, provide options and opportunities, and be
honest about what to expect as they try to excel in any chosen activity.
• Make them feel positive. Give children lots of praise. They’ll
want to do more if they feel good about what they’re doing. Just make sure
you’re sincere, honest, and specific.
• Use rewards wisely. Sometimes a reward helps a child get started
in an activity or motivate kids them when they’re losing interest. But use
the reward only to give them a jump-start. After that, replace rewards with
verbal encouragement.
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IN
THIS ISSUE
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- Helping Your Child Through A First Crush Or
Heart Break
- Teach Your Children To Apply Themselves
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ABOUT
Company
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Hello!
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Are
These On Your Calendar?
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American
Heart Month. Heart disease kills an estimated 630,000
Americans each year. February has been celebrated as American Heart
Month since 1963 as part of the effort to urge Americans to join
the battle against heart disease. Learn how to reduce your risk
through lifestyle changes and, in some cases, medication.
Black
History Month. An annual observance in the United
States, Canada, and the United Kingdom to commemorate the history
and contributions of black people. Black History Month was
officially recognized by the U.S. government in 1976, with
President Gerald R. Ford urging Americans to “seize the opportunity
to honor the too-often neglected accomplishments of black Americans
in every area of endeavor throughout our history.”
VALENTINE’S
DAY
Saint Valentine's Day, also known as Valentine's Day or the Feast
of Saint Valentine, is a holiday observed on February 14 each year.
In 1537, England's King Henry VII officially declared Feb. 14 the
holiday of St. Valentine's Day and is associated with romantic
love.
In
the Eastern Orthodox Church, St. Valentine's Day is celebrated on
July 6, in which Saint Valentine, the Roman presbyter, is honoured.
Over
1 billion Valentine’s Day cards are exchanged each year. It’s the
second biggest season for cards.
In Victorian times it was considered bad luck to sign a Valentine’s
Day card.
Even
3% of pet owners give Valentine’s Day cards to their pets!
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